On the Weed and Sammy Yutin

Was Sammy Yutim a victim of 21st Century weed as well as Police Murder?

60's weed may have been a path to enlightenment, but with 6 times the THC content, 21st Century weed can be a road to destruction.

Sure let's shoot him 3 times and then wait a bit and shoot him 6 more times--and don't forget to taser him after you have shot 9 times

On Vaccinations

Welcome back measles--thanks for the fraud Dr. Wakefield

Can Polio be far behind---thanks for the paranoia J. F. Kennedy Jr.

How about some small pox---thanks for the ignorance Jenny McCarthy

The Twentieth Century

The Blog has 2,000+ hits in its first 33 days.

Canada's in first, USA second, but Russia is moving up and threatening to overtake the Americans

Perhaps Russia's strong showing is a reflection of how awful the Television programmes are---or perhaps it's a reflection of high the unemployment has become

On that logic, Greece, Italy and Spain should be very high hitters--perhaps their unemployment is so high that, unlike the Russian, they can't even afford the Internet

Lunch, Anyone?

So where is the corruption the greatest--Russia or India?

 Yummy--Pass the pesticides

Of course its safe--my husband sold it to us

Navalny

Compared to Putin, I'd vote for you--but even if I were Russian, they probably wouldn't count it

Nicky, Nicky, you got to lighten up on that ethnocentric stuff--Russia has had too many rabid nationalists.

Beware that you aren't just cleaning up one form of corruption to simply replace it with another

The Enemies List

Now Harper's right up there with his idle Tricky, Dicky, ' I thought that was Vietnam. Who put Cambodia down there?' Nixon--they both have enemy lists

I wonder if I have made it onto Putin's list--if I have I might win a reward

Major Ford's list includes the media, anyone who owns a bike, and all those Voters who live downtown--they're all gay dope fiends--hey Doug--I think I found a new market for you.

Job Opportunities

Hydro Repairmen--more climate change storms will keep you busy

Crematorium Attendants--as the Zommers turn to ash

White Servants--as Chinese status symbols

Alexi Navalny

On Sochi, "An unprecedented thief's caper"

Yo-- Alexi--nice wife--she would make a nice first lady

Alexi released on bail--perhaps demonstrations do help--or is it the pressure from the West?

In any event, stay away from the plutonium

Dubai--Your next Resort Destination

Norwegian woman who alleges rape, gets 16 months in prison--to be fair the guy got 15 months

A Dubai police officer ,trained in such delicate matters, did inquire if she was claiming rape because the sex was not fulfilling--this guy could  work for the RCMP

An Emirate woman is sent to prison for a year after claiming that she was gang raped--to be fair she got a lesser sentence because gang rape is part of her cultural norm.

Detroit keeps on giving

The good news--Wall street banks invested $1 billion in Detroit bonds

The worst news--they used your money

The ugly new---the government will bail them out with your tax dollars--so you get to lose twice

The Royal Baby

The heir arrives--now for the spare--the one without Charles' ears should be the King

A name you say--how about Waldo--as in HERE'S Waldo

How arcane, absurd and inoffensive the Monarchy has become

On Sochi

Sochi will host the Winter Olympics---what a great idea--it even has palm Trees

Gary Kasparov,  On Sochi, "I never doubted (Putin) and his cronies would take the gold"--I don't think Gary is talking about the gold medal

Putin says Sochi will cost $9 billion. The Economist magazine says it will cost $ 50 billion--let's see that's $41 billion divided by how many Puffy Putin Pastries?

On Finished Cities

It has been said that Toronto will be a nice place to live if it's ever finished--trust me, you don't want to live in a City that's "finished"

Detroit owes $8.2 billion to its employee pension and unfunded health care plans--- unfunded state and municipal pension liabilities are $2 Trillion---yes, that is a T.

In the last 8 years, Wall St. has collected $473 million in fees from Detroit  for restructuring it's debt--and former Mayor K. Kilpatrick is serving a 15-20 year sentence for racketeering, extortion and fraud--got to love the spirit of public service

Now there's a 'finished city'

On Renovating a Man--Part Two

Start with the premise that he is a bear with furniture

Observe that his manners would make a chimp blush

Stick to his exterior-- his interior is beyond your control

Sexuality

Lies in the small of a woman's back

In her laughter

And in her surrender--not to you, but to herself

Human Spirtuality

Is found in the Cathedrals of the Forest

In the Abbeys of the Night Sky

And, in the Hands of a Baby

You know you're Married, Part 6

When she says,"He really prefers small- breasted women."

When she wears your T shirts as night gowns

When you don't put the seat up, even when you're taking a leak

The Harper Shuffel

Harper's "generational change"---on average the babies are under 52 years of age--enfants

For stability, the 3 most powerful cabinet posts go to the Harrisites hacks- Tony, 'sure that gazebo is on the Border', Clement; John the 'Bulldog 'Baird: and Jimmy, 'I am not embarrassed, it's a skin condition', Flaherty.

And for a bit of fresh air its Peter, the Fighter Pilot, MacKay

Cars and Babies

Unless you like your babies baked--don't leave them in your car

Grandmother charged with criminal negligence after her 2 year old grandson dies of heat stroke in her car---is suicide a viable option for this poor women.

No criminal charges are laid in the death of a 3 year old girl--for her parents, is this a blessing or a curse?

Would you leave your wallet in your car--it's all a matter of priorities

Marriage Mates

Young women assume there will always be a handy supply of eligible men

By their 30s, they find a wasteland, and the "let's settle for him" syndrome may arrive

Well, he's got a job and he doesn't smell too bad.

Canada, and USA fall behind USSR in weekly hits

Must be all my Mongolian relatives--A give away--Almond eyes, and a Mongolian Fold brow

Oh, and don't forget short and fat

Now it could be Puff Putin's secret police

When Driving with your Child*

Please keep your Lizard in the trunk

Beware. the Silver Dog will encourage you to drive into oncoming traffic

With luck, your child wont close your eyes too often

*Please see 4 July 12, 2013 posts

Snowden in Moscow

Snowden has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize---a move to strengthen American-Swedish relations?

If Snowden wins, he will join other American notables ;such as, Barrack Obama, and Henry Kissinger--strange bedfellows

Snowden--a hero for civil rights--or a traitor--let's hear your thoughts

You know you're Married Part 5

When she says," We don't like big cars"

When she says," We love to shop for antiques."

When she says, " We'll take the black suit and the red tie."

Where's that Super Power Pride

For the first week ever, the USSR has more blog hits than the USA--America sucking wind?

Now I really have to learn some Russian History--perhaps the cute expat in accounting....

Is Ukraine's largest export beautiful women for impotent Americans --oops--- Ukraine is no longer part of the USSR--or is it?

The Insurance Salesman Comes Calling

When he insists on a personal visit, answer the door in a ratty old robe---but first, sprinkle it with whisky

It would be helpful if you're at least a 100 lbs overweight

But don't overdue it---only remove your lower dentures

On the Child

The Child, who prefers to be called EQ, is at the heart of the Asylum--he is the EQ to Dr. Spock's IQ

While Dr. Spock nudges the Child with reason and quiet persuasion, the Lizard, the Black Dog, and the Silver Dog nip at him with fear, depression and destruction

When he can, the Red Dog will protect the Child, but he often does it with Rage

On the Lizard

The Lizard is not only primordial, ---he is even prenatal

The Lizard is a creature of fight or flight---all other reactions escape his brain pan

The best one can hope for is to keep him quietly soaking in the streams of the Sun

On Dr. Spock

Dr. Spock is pure intellect--without passions or personality

His namesake is of course Science Officer Spock of the Star ship Enterprise--an actual Mr. Data

Or perhaps, he is named in memory of Dr. B. Spock--a child psychologist of mid-century acclaim

In any event, Dr. Spock will seek to control the action in the ring as our pugilists "get ready to Ruuumble"

The Inmates

The Asylum is directed by the formidable intellect of Dr. Spock--or so he likes to think

The oldest inmate is the Lizard, a necessary, but unpleasant, primordial creature--he is imperious to persuasion

The institution is devoted to the well being of the Child---he is the centre of love and of hate

The Red Dog gives the Child his strength, his determination and his protection---but he also gives him his rage, and his arrogance

Dr. Spock must constantly protect the Child from the Black Dog's depression, and the Silver Dog's self-destructive impulses

Perhaps your Asylum has these creatures as well

Our story involves the interaction between the inmates, and you will hear all their voices--with luck you  will hear from Dr. Spock, and the Child more often than you hear from the Lizard and the Hounds

All that Glitters is not Gold

It maybe that nice shinny Mercury that poisons the children at mining sites

We have blood diamonds, and now we have blood gold

Slavery is universally outlawed--yet there are up to 27 million slaves in the World today.

The Three Golden Equations

Study=Knowledge

Knowledge+Experience= Understanding

Understanding+Acceptance=Wisdom

You Know You're Married when

She pokes you through the bars --and you like it.

The Child in your Asylum plays happily with the Child in his Asylum.

He gives you a gift certificate to your favourite show store--instead of a small appliance

On the BC Pipe

Up with Rail, Down with Pipelines

A tank car floating down the Frasier River--so much nicer than a Kinder Morgan Pipe

Tanker car movement in Canada in 1999--500---in 2012--144,000

On Water

All the Earth's water comes from Space--the earth has never made water--it only recycles it

All that drinking water was once waste water

All the water in the world has passed through a pig's bladder--some religions

may have to prohibit the use of water

Frac Off

Fracking chemicals make bitumen look like drinking water

Fracking never hurt anyone --and neither did acid rain, agent orange, or asbestos

You can bet your life that 30% of fracking wells don't poison the ground water--and you'd be right--it's actually 50%

On Bottled Water

25% of North American bottled water is tap water wrapped in plastic

A bottle of tap water is 3000 times more expensive than tap water

While we enjoy the purity of our tap water, lets remember the indestrutable

Frac You

Think a wind turbine might lower your property values--try a fracking well

Fracking is exempt from the Clean Water Act--a gift from Tricky Dicky Cheney

Give your child a birthday earth quake--frack a fault line.

From a Teacher

Teachers' are control freaks who certainly feel entitled to their entitlements

Teachers' are often damaged goods with low EQs

Teachers are the most difficult clients for lawyers and for mediators

Frac Away

Join the Homeland list of eco-terrorists---oppose fracking

Fracking chemicals do not migrate into ground water--just ask any hydrologist hire by the gas industry--don't you just love junk science?

The only thing that produces more green house gases than coal--fracked gasd

Rail World Inc.

Lac Megantic --just a flash in the pan

A 'Huge Ray of Light' isn't necessarily bring clarity--it may be just the fring of the Fire Hall

Could Lac Megantic be Harper's Walkerton--probably not, but Duffy Dollars might do it

Handle a Pervert with Style

Tell him you love his pumps

Praise his pearls

Tell him its just like a penis--only smaller

Duffy Dollars

Will buy Get Out of Jail for Free cards

Won't buy you $17 orange juice--for that you need taxpayer dollars

Won't pay for a vet's PT SD

Green Acres Moments 2

How do you know it's time for boating lessons---when you land your boat half way up on the dock

If your pipes freeze twice in 3 years--you might need a plumber.

You might take pause, when your electrician tells you that ,as an electrician, the previous owner was a good plumber

When is it time to buy that firewood--when your axe thuds into your foot

On Renovating a Man--Part 1--It's going to need a lot of Parts

Women often think men are a renovation project--a good foundation that needs a lot of work

He's going to quit smoking and he'll exercise everyday--and he'll definitely stop slurping his soup.

Why don't men know that their underwear has a best before date?

On the Constitution

If God inspired the Constitution, why did she validate Slavery?

If God wrote the Constitution, why did he allow Child Labour?

If  'She' wrote the Constitution, why did she disenfranchise Women---and why didn't she outlaw Sarah Palin?

God's mysteries are a wonder to behold--or perhaps he's just obtuse

On Burial

Why do we bury the Dead---so they can drag their old carcases to the After Life?

Why do we mutilate our Fallen Enemies--so they cross the River Styx blind and impotent?

We should burn them--so much more sanitary and civilized

On Writing

It's like giving birth--thank God for the drugs.

Blogging is so much easier--just mix a little narcissism with a little insomnia.

You can pretend that someone actually reads the stuff

On Fanatics

Right wing fanatics just want to kill you.

Left wing fanatics want to kill you --after you acknowledge they were always right

Religious fanatics want to kill you---after you accept their God as the one true God

On Lobbying

Lobbying--the cancer on our Democracy.

Why do the wealthy spend millions of their own money getting elected to Congress--perhaps it"s so they can sell themselves for even more money.

A good Lobby would be one that lobbied to abolish Lobbies.

Mandel's Bones

Why does his grandson crave Mandel's bones--oh yeah, to display them at his Theme Park--now that's respect

Winnie wants them for her Exhibition---now that's  undying love

Perhaps they should be scattered at Churches across S. Africa--like the bones of medieval Saints

On the Zodiac

The Professor does not believe in Astrology

But he finds it passing strange that
  He has an Earth sign reflecting his pragmatic peasant stock

  He is ruled by the Planet Mars which speaks to Hounds from Hell

  His element is Fire for his Rage

On Fences

Obama celebrates the destruction of the Berlin Wall.

Meanwhile, Congress proposes to end unemployment by hiring 20,000 new Border Guards to help patrol an additional 700 miles of fence on the Mexican Border.

If all 40,000 Border Guards were lined up along the Mexican Border, there would be 1 every 250 feet---How did that Great Wall of China thing work out?

On the Legacy

Is this poetic prose, or pedantic posturing?

Will the Legacy have goblets of gold, or shards of silver or lipids of lead

Only Shylock knows

On Science

Republican Congressman Dr. Burgess (OBGYN), reports that "Science" Proves that fetuses masturbate in the womb--so they obviously feel pain and pleasure and must not be aborted--and you thought the little guy was just kicking

At the same time he asserts that "Science" supports Creationism, not Evolution.

Needless to say, the same "Science", also debunks the theory of Climate Change--oh take me back to Oral Roberts U

Best Scents and Sights

SCENTS
             A Baby's Breath

             The Nape of a Woman's Neck

             The Smell of Love

SIGHTS
              A Baby at the Mother's Breast

              The Hallow of Her Back

              Cathedrals of the Forest






               

More Trend Setting

Easy with that horn--it's not a penis extension

Only ignore 90% of the panhandlers you meet--there but for Grace, go you and I

Tip at least 20%--even if herr breasts don't flop into your soup

A Person who Gets Things Done V. A Person who Does Things

Getting your house renovated--it's not as nice as renovating your house

Raising your children is wonderful---having them raised by others isn't

Collecting Art is much less satisfying than making Art

My Son the Lawyer

"My Son the Lawyer", will son be eclipsed by,"My Son the Electrician".

When a Average retirement age for lawyers is 75, perhaps you might want to rethink your career path.

"My Son the Doctor', will still have cache